August 15-18, 1969

From: One Time In Moab

To: Hippies

Dear Hippies,

        Taking drugs in the desert doesn’t make you closer to nature. We’re sorry, but it’s the truth. We know there’s no metric that measures connection to the natural world, that we can’t take a ruler and say, “Oh, that guy’s eight centimeters away from nature”, but I’m 100% certain that tripping balls two hundred feet from your car won’t give you any significant insights about the rock you can’t stop touching.

        The basic idea is that ingesting drugs, mainly hallucinogenic drugs, in a wild environment will provide one with insights concerning their relationship with nature. That’s a crock of poo. By that logic, if we wanted to gain a closer relationship with math,weI could eat LSD and stare at a math textbook for nine hours instead of, you know, studying math.

       People who worship hallucinogens often cite the practices of indigenous cultures, who are (rightly) perceived as having a more genuine connection to the natural world than your average susurbanite. Indigenous people aren’t knowledgeable about the natural world because they drank peyote or ayahusca. They’re knowledgeable about the natural world because they inhabit it and possess the necessary skills to thrive in it. Do you really think that Native Americans were excellent trackers and navigators because they tripped balls that one time when they came of age or because they spent a lifetime tracking and navigating? How many members of the Grateful Dead do you think could survive a winter bivouac in the Canadian Rockies?

       If you think of people famous for their association with nature, the only real thread that connects them is the intensity of their pursuit of what’s out there. John Muir was the greatest wanderer of all time. Jon Krakauer is as serious of a mountaineer as he is a writer. Thoreau spent two years in a cabin in the woods. Jane Goodall lived with the creatures that fascinated her. Edward Abbey’s books reflect a lifetime of sore feet and dusty clothes. None of them are famous for dosing so hard, you guys. Sure, some of them indulged in hallucinogens, but that’s not the point. If their experiences had happened solely inside their head, we wouldn’t care about them.

       If you want to get closer to mountains or rivers or deserts, learn about them. Push your limits. Want to get closer to a forest? Learn what plants and berries are edible. Practice building a shelter. Read a book on birds. Want to develop your relationship with the mountains? Climb a mountain. I guarantee you taking an avalanche course will provide more insight on snow or winter than eating boomers in February.

       We’re not saying taking drugs isn’t fun. If it wasn’t, people wouldn’t do it. We’re not even saying that people shouldn’t do it- that’s not our point. It’s disconcerting to see people full of piss and vinegar choosing to chemically elevate mundane experiences to the level of an adventure rather than having an experience that stands out on its own. In the end, it’s about placing experiences over feelings.

PS: If we hear one more person talk about how their day spent meandering around some car-accessible state park and giggling at things changed their lives, the editorial staff of One Time In Moab will buy a helicopter with a PA system and fly it around Burning Man shouting “YOU’RE NEVER COMING DOWN!” over and over until everybody there supports Scott Walker.

P.P.S. Obviously, the editorial staff of OTIM obviously doesn’t condone taking illegal drugs, especially if you’re doing something inherently risky.